Sunday, June 29, 2008 ♥
Last posted@10:37 PM
Today is SHANGYI's birthday!
we celebrated it yesterday though. So excuse the previous EMO entry. ppl keep complaining. so i shall now write about more cheery stuff!
Yesterday was a very eventful day. in the morning, me, shang, seow, mei hung, huayhan and xinli came to help out with ms lye's shelter painting activity project thing at labrador park(which btw, is very inaccessible) we painted jellyfishies while another group painted crabbies. it was pretty fun..though xm couldn't make it, and POOR ANDRE FELL DOWN ON HIS WAY THERE and FRACTURED something! omg..ms lye joked saying he has forgotten how to walk on level ground..lol..cos of all the jumping off planes and stuff. =) anyway, after it was done, some went to play frisbee for a while before we headed to vivo to lunch.
strange spider we spotted..
awww..sl looks so kiddy happy and cute.
frisbee tutorial from our new friend.
We went to eat at secret recipe. ms lye and ms hew were there too. yumyum food..ms lye's treat! OH..felt bad..heard the bill was over $100!!! for 8 people! shouldn't have ordered drinks if we'd known. haha. but sadly, me, shang, hh and seow had to zippy off in a hurry right after lunch to try and get to esplanade for cheng hong's piano recital. this is how much trouble we were in. her recital started at 3pm, and we were still sittin in the restauraunt at 2:50pm. can u imagine how we had to rush! ran to the mrt station and stopped at clark quay and then ran some more, carrying HEAVY BAGGAGE, all the way pass supreme court and even across the padang, where they were having cricket match. we must have looked damn spare crossing lor. we reached at 3:20pm, but we'd ,missed cheng's performance. haish. so sad, but we sat down to enjoy the rest of it. at the same time, allowed the ppl around us to enjoy the warmth and stench radiating from our sweaty bodies. lol.
Then finally headed to East Coast Park. first thing we did was to lay out sl's sheet on the first nice spot we saw and lazed around till it was all dark. took tons of pictures of twilight. BEAUTIFUL!!! gave shang her present, she "CRIED" through the whole thing. so farnii. but twas so nice just sitting there with the breeze and the atmosphere and the wonderful company. =)) after dinner, we walked GREAT DISTANCES all the way to big splash in anticipation of fireworks display, but we were cheated..so nvm, hung around at the bus stop before being pleasantly surprised that sl's bro was willing to send us all home...OMG!!! THAT IS SO NICE OF HIM! cos today i asked my brother if he would and u noe what he said?? he said, "do i have a crush on one of ur fwens?" SEE! my brother needs a condition to do such a nice thing lor. omg...SL! ur brother is damn nice. THANK YOU!!!
Haha..so really, it was such a great day! though somehow i felt like most of it was spent walking and running around..but as long as it's done with good company, it's painless! though today i woke up and couldn't really move..or stand up, or sit down, or climp up or down stairs. lol. HEHEx. all i can say is, spending time with ppl u love is super priceless. =)
♥ with love, meow
Friday, June 27, 2008 ♥
Last posted@9:59 PM
i am paranoid
or perhaps just dangerously intuitive
i have been having terrible mood swings lately. i find being left alone with my thoughts extremely dangerous, cos a lot of the time, i get stricken with some sort of mad anger, eventually leading to me smashing something, or ramming some body part into a wall or floor. It seems the happenings of the past few months, although all has already come to an end, has drastically, and perhaps permanently fractured my spirit and nature. i still find myself having to deal with the psychological aftermath of my anger, extreme disappointment, and sadness on a daily basis. i have yet to find closure, but i predict that this closure i may never truly find. i loathe myself.
anyway. for now, i must eat my emotions. i have to do certain things with good intention but inevitable bitterness. i want to do them, but can't help feeling my own pain and sourness whilst doing them. if u're confused bout what i'm trying to say, it's probably better this way. i finished wrapping shangyi's birthday gift. i'm so proud of my workmanship that i had to take a picture.
and this is just something me and cheng hong spotted on thursday at work. some random thing which we found damn funny. enjoy.
please forgive me for my emo-ness.
♥ with love, meow
Sunday, June 22, 2008 ♥
Last posted@9:43 PM
MY BABY EATS BROCCOLI!!!
now broccoli is good fer my baby, as well as for all doggies out there because it helps them to keep their teeth nice and clean and shiny! and clean teeth means a clean mouth, and a clean mouth means perfect smelling doggy breath. and we all like fresh smelling breath, whether comin from people or our little doggies and kitties. so let ur babies(doggies) eat broccoli STEMS today! just the STEMS. it may take a little coaxing, cos it dun smell too nice to them, but once they start biting into it, they'll taste the yummy sweetness! and they'll gobble it up real quick! CRUNCH! CRUNCH! and it's gone. HEHE!
dogs also LOVE<3<3<3 peanut butter!
♥ with love, meow
Wednesday, June 18, 2008 ♥
Last posted@9:33 PM
aunty flew home today
it's so irritatin. i'm always so happy when she comes. and it's the same old wonderful routine. go out almost everyday to town to shop, or just laze around at home with her around. whatever it is, no matter how mundane, it's always fun, and i'm always happy. i duno what it is that makes me so glad that she's here. then, as the days pass, and the remaining days she has with us become lesser and lesser, i start a dreaded countdown..and those last few days..just fly by. and the night before i know she leaves, i never sleep.so this morning she left. i knew i had to send her off, even though it might've been easier not to..had to say goodbye..even though it's so hard..every time. the only thing that kept me together after she disappeared into the departure hall was the adrenaline rush triggered by my being late for work..like i said, work distracts me pleasantly..she's still in the plane now. a 24 hour flight back to canada. she'll touch down at toronto at aproximately 11am tomorrow mornin, singapore time. haish. what's the point of calculating all these things, i wunt see her again till next year. i know i'll get over it soon, like i always do, but while the missin lasts, it's sad, and sore..and i think bout all the crap i have to go through b4 she comes again..and i feel sooo...pleh.I MISS MY AUNTY!!!
come back soon..
♥ with love, meow
Sunday, June 15, 2008 ♥
Last posted@8:22 PM
!!!!NEW LAPTOP!!!!
O baby!!! so me, bro, papa and mama dragged ourselves down to suntec to take a look at the PC fair going on, even though we knew that it'd be bloody crowded and full of irritating singaporeans. but no matter, we have ta get new laptops sooner or later, so must as well be now and take advantage of the great prices. so after a major Car Horn competition in the carpark, we received divine blessings - when we saw a free spot right in front of us. zoom zoom zoom!ok. the strange thing was, we didn't even step into the actual PC fair at the convention centre. we were walking there, when we saw all these other PC shops taking advantage of the PC fair crowd, and they had even BETTER prices than the PC fair!!! woowoo! so we went ta take a look and got an awesome deal fer a like $100 cheaper. aint that swell..so me and gor settled on the dell inspiron 4120- 250GB Hard drive, 3GB Ram, 14' screen, 3year warranty(in comparison with 1 year at PCfair), free 24 month antivirus, hm..lotsa other stuff but can't remember. anyway, of course the highlight was we get to choose out of lotsa nice colours!!! as seen below. gor chose navy blue, i chose white! hehehe. all ready to go to school. =) i also got this super cute mouse which is in the shape of a fish or something..the right and left click are the eyess....OOooo...so happy!
♥ with love, meow
Saturday, June 14, 2008 ♥
Last posted@9:29 PM
2012
supposedly, 2012 is the year of armageddon. i doubt so. cos god said "it will come when we least expect it". so if everybody is expecting it to come in 2012, then it probably won't. unless everyone thinks like me, in which case, it might very well be in 2012. so o well..it's scarey if u think about it. 2012 is only 4 years away..i'd still be finishing up uni..wouldn't have gotten the chance to travel the world like i've dreamt, to fulfill long desired dreams..it'd be quite unfortunate to think that i wouldn't be able to live my earthly life to its' fullest..then again, if it's not my generation, then it'd just be another generation of ppl like me in the future who wouldn't be able to live their lives..so..must as well be me..and you.
so hey everybody..half of 2008 is already gone, and i spent most of it fighting pointlessly for a dream which i must now store quietly at the back of my closet. in this short half year, i've probably cried more times then i have in the past 10 years..believe it or not..even including last year(i cried many times last year too). but all that is hopefully in the past. besides..i think crying is liberating..i kinda like to cry really. so how have the rest of u spent the first half of 2008? fruitfully i hope.
recently, i've fallen in love...with a gem stone. it's called morganite..ok..it all started with the whole hooha bout my mum's aquamarine ring..aquamarine being her birthstone, and i love it so much. but i can't copy her..and my birth stone is like...RUBY...which is like..pretty ugly. ok..it's not ugly, i just do not like dark coloured stones...cos they look ah-ma-ish and cheena. so i set of on a mission to find a stone that i love and that i can signature..and i was walking past all the shops at people's park...that building with all the jewelery shops, and there was only one shop with this awsomely wonderful, very clear, slightly pinky stone. and it was love at first sight. lol. so lame. but nvm. i love it so much because it looks like a pink diamond.. also cos it's rare, and well, it cost fairly more than normal stones...hehehehehe..MORGANITE! or PINK BERYL!
♥ with love, meow
Thursday, June 12, 2008 ♥
Last posted@9:34 PM
taken keen interest in photography lately
i bought 'water babies'.
or whatever they're called.
they look like tiny little beads when u buy them.
but when u add water..
they grow.
they're so fun to touch and play with.
cheap thrill.
♥ with love, meow
Wednesday, June 11, 2008 ♥
Last posted@9:37 AM
8:30am darkness
i thought i was somewhere different
but i'm still here
♥ with love, meow
Tuesday, June 10, 2008 ♥
Last posted@9:41 PM
Success doesn't mean the absence of failures; it means the attainment of ultimate objectives. It means winning the war, not every battle.
it's so stupid that all my entries lately are just so sad and angry..even tze is complainin..even though she also got sad and angry posts all the time. you noe, just when u think u can't get any lower, u just do and i wonder..why!?!? why is this happening to me. was it not enough of a blow to have that door closed in my face, but to witness that exact same door being opened to someone else, in fact, the door is literally pulling her in...and it's not just someone, but it's a close fwen..and i'm not sure if that makes it easier or harder to deal with..
anyway..i'm dealing. it's not like ppl are making it any easier, talking bout how beautiful UK is right in my face..
my aunty is still here from canada. she's been here a week already and one more to go b4 she goes home..that'll be another sad thing..haish. alwas miss her when she leaves. all this misery in my life is really making me sick and pimply.. =( i duno if i'm looking forward to uni at all now..i still can't imagine what i'm going to be studyin..i still feel so lost..and now there's talk bout the end of the world being in 2012 or somethin...i'd be 23...way too young to die man..must as well just die now actually..since i dun feel like this life anyway..
that's my mum and aunt.
♥ with love, meow
Saturday, June 7, 2008 ♥
Last posted@9:20 PM
i am soooooo trying to be happy for u...
but i really can't right now...
cos no one can imagine how totally SHITTY i feel
cos it's so ironic..
and soooo...
there are no words to fit the anguish.
♥ with love, meow
Friday, June 6, 2008 ♥
Last posted@10:05 PM
rant rant rant rant rant rant
i shall not curse and swear at a certain organisation so much rite now cos u noe what, i might get sued fer defamation and put in jail. cos that's the kinda place i'm living in. one which says we have freedom of speech but puts us in jail for saying something which might "ruin the peace".
what i will say is that they are one fucked up organisation, who give ppl everything but what they DON'T WANT or NEED.
i can't believe i'm living here.
to hell with this place.
i'm outta here as soon as i get the chance.
♥ with love, meow
Tuesday, June 3, 2008 ♥
Last posted@10:24 PM
my family is damn screwed up. my ah gong is throwing tantrums like a freagin CHILD..refusin to go places with us, even refused to go fer his WIFE'S 80th birthday. like wth. i noe i'm supposed to be filial and respect my elders and all that but this is totally ridiculous. i've heard how my mum, aunt and uncle had such a horrible childhood in his house, but now i see it first hand. like i'm PISSED with him la..over that STUPID STUPID thing?!?!??! he's thorwing tantrums fer like 3 weeks or more already lor. like how effing childish is that?!?!?! my dad can't be bothered with it, he says he's been tolerating it fer years...but like, my mum is so emotionally stressed and she din even do anything wrong..argh. what the hell is wrong with that man?!?!?!ya..so he refused to go fer my ah ma's bday dinner tonite. all the better and no difference anyway, cos if he was there, it'd just be one black long face at the table. nobody likes that. As usual, the dinner was uber quiet and torturous..i had lunch at like 1530, so sitting through a 10 course meal...go figure. and i got a feeling my uncle and family thinks i'm some hopeless case..some stupid person who's not worth talking to. oh well...maybe i am.i thought maybe if i got the scholarship and went to london, i can tell them - "YEA! i'm studying in london on scholarship'', maybe i'd get a little respect at least..or a little recognition for my achievements. but no. that's what u get fer being related to a born genius and his genius offspring. you become a nothing..even if u got good grades etc, it's really worth nothing when ur genius cousins are studying international baccaulerettes, studying in cambridge, studying medicine wherever...hopping all across the world while you can't even get the chance to taste london air.to hell with it.
♥ with love, meow
♥
Last posted@5:28 PM
"I know the plans i have for you" declared the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
-Jeremiah chapter 29, verse 11-
argh. help me to accept.
accept what lies ahead.
accept what i cannot change.
accept the dreams unfulfilled.
Thank you claudyne for this verse, reminding me of what's important. sometimes the plans we make for ourselves aren't always the plans that would necessarily lead us down the path that is right fer us in our lives.
My aunt is here from Toronto! yay! always so glad when she comes. pity my cuz didn't come along. miss him alot. he's alot of fun. =) anyway..she came at like 5am in the morning s haven't seen her yet..but will see tonite at long awkward silent dinner..hm.
Oh. i wuld like to say that guys are real pigs..some of them anyway. They think of girls as objects to be owned fer their own pathetic pleasure. and not just objects, but CHEAP objects. like wth. if u're so desperate to fuck something, go fuck a melon, dun think that we can be 'conquered' with cheap thrills and cheap words which dun mean shit. like seriously..SOME people think we are that stupid..disgustins. totally disgusting.
TAKE A HINT! if u dun see someone online anymore, if ur sms goes unanswered, OBVIOUSLY u are being avoided and cancelled out of that someone's life. you can't be that THICK rite?!?!??!?!
glad i finally got that out. oh. but not all guys are bad. just certain aquaintances and ppl i know of. so dear guy fwens, seriously no offence. =)
♥ with love, meow
Sunday, June 1, 2008 ♥
Last posted@9:49 PM
i'm a genius la.
i made cheesecake jellies!
i'm a genius.
♥ with love, meow
